Solemn
by spero spiro
Summary: [Toph wasn’t afraid of anything, except Sokka’s rage.] SokkaToph. Oneshot.


**Solemn**

**Note:**** This is my first stab at Sokka/Toph, and while I'm not totally sure I handled the characters right, I really hope they came out relatively close to how I wanted. It's easy to write Aang, as I mentioned previously, because he's a lot like writing Kenshin, and it's not so difficult to write Katara, because she's like other characters I've encountered. Sokka is wholly unique, as is Toph, and trying to put the right spin on them is a little harder than I'd like it to be, but I love the challenge of writing new characters. As time passes, I'm hopeful that I'll catch onto Sokka's wit and Toph's sarcasm and write them well. Hope you all enjoy, and, as always, I appreciate constructive criticism and ego-stroking through reviews. **

**Disclaimer: I stake no claim on Avatar: The Last Airbender, the characters thereof, etc. Please, don't sue me.**

**Description[****Toph wasn't afraid of anything, except Sokka's rage.**** Sokka/****Toph. One-shot.**

Toph sat down onto the stone floor, the vibrations of everyone mimicking her actions around her echoing through her frail form. She curled her knees up to her chest, keeping the sardonic remarks in her head to herself, because this was definitely not the time for them. Usually, she was okay with offending people in somber moments, but…

She sighed. Things had only been so solemn that she wouldn't crack a smile one other time, when Aang had been shot down by Azula and Katara had shown up, sobbing and clutching the air-bender's limp form. In fact, she had spent weeks keeping her comments to herself out of respect for Katara's pain, until Aang finally woke up again. Now… in light of another failure, she was silent. Besides, this time she herself was caught up in worries and solemn frustrations.

Katara had told her the stories of their journey before they found her, and those stories included the ones of Yue and Suki. She had met Suki, later on, and was quite surprised to find that the warrior was sharp on wit and not at all as stupid as Toph had hoped she would be. Even she was a little stricken and sad when she discovered that Suki had been taken prisoner by Azula. _No one_ deserved that, least of all someone who was kind like Suki was. She couldn't blame Sokka for the way he'd reacted, even facilitated his rage by pinning Azula to the wall. But… there was something in his voice, in the way his whole body was shaking in rage that scared her. And then she realized.

He was in love with her.

Not a silly crush, or even a mild infatuation someone might expect out of a normal teenager. No, Sokka wasn't normal, and Toph had been watching him age dramatically since she had met him. The blunder in Ba Sing Se was probably the point where Sokka quit being a kid, and really came of age into a man. He was the one who planned the escape, the one who dressed them all in Fire Nation clothing, and hid Aang from the world, even perpetuated rumors of his death. He wasn't thinking like "the meat and sarcasm guy" anymore. He had grown up, and was entitled to grown up emotions, but Toph just hadn't realized it until the dark fear, that Sokka might actually kill Azula, burned in the pit of her stomach.

For a moment in time, she recoiled from him in fear, even though that rage was only directed toward Azula. Toph was ashamed of herself for that fear. She wanted to think she was in love with Sokka, but she had been afraid of that side of him, and secretly admitted that she never wanted to see that side of him again. It had consumed him entirely, in a way only Toph could see. His body temperature leaped, his heart rate sped up furiously, angry tears spilled from his eyes, and she felt the trembling of his very core in the earth around him. She wondered if Aang had seen the tears, and she knew for certain that she had never seen Sokka cry. It just didn't fit with who he was, and that moment of boiled over emotion frightened her. Toph wasn't afraid of anything, except Sokka's rage, and that was enough to shake her to the core and make her doubt her feelings.

She sighed again and leaned against a wall, blind eyes staring unseeing up to the ceiling. The truth was, when she compared her feelings for Sokka against the ones he clearly felt for Suki, they were pitiful. Would she get that angry if something were to happen to him? Would he lose his cool demeanor and flare up like an ogre if it had been her and not Suki? Would he cry for her? The ugly doubt inside her chest told her no, on both counts. She was only twelve, and therefore couldn't really be capable of feelings so complex, so intense, so… _grown._

_Aang's twelve, and he can._ A hopeful voice told her, but she reminded herself that Aang was the Avatar, and not exactly normal.

She felt the vibrations of someone coming nearer to her, and she was surprised to realize it was Sokka.

"Hi, Toph." He sat next to her, and she was hardly surprised to catch the hint of misery in his voice. But he was trying very hard to sound more cheerful than he was, and she appreciated that much.

"Hi, Sokka." She echoed his tone and inflections, reaching up to take off her hat and toss it unceremoniously across the floor.

"I, uh…" He rubbed his head. "I never thanked you for helping me back there. For saving me, too."

Toph had forgotten about that last bit. It had just been automatic for her to leap into action, and she had done so to knock him out of the way of Azula's attack. "Oh. It wasn't really much of anything." She was still so ashamed of that moment of fear, even though she had reacted, even helped him with it.

"Still…" He sighed, pressing the base of his palms against his eyes. "It means a lot."

Toph paused, considering her options. Sokka didn't know if the girl he was in love with was dead or alive. All he knew was that, either way, she had endured horrors at Azula's hands. Just as his tribesmen and father would. Just as Toph's new comrades would. Toph thought for a moment that she might cry, just as Aang had.

"I'm sorry." She murmured quietly.

He seemed a little surprised, and stared at her openly for a moment. She pretended not to notice.

"Oh. It's… Well. It's not alright. But… I'm sorry for you, too. Those earth-benders are as much kindred to you as the Water Tribe warriors we had to leave."

"But that was your father. And… And…" Toph found that she was unable to finish the sentence.

"Suki?" He finished for her.

"Yeah…" She admitted, grudgingly. Saying it would mean she would have to fully acknowledge his feelings for the warrior girl, and refusal to do so was one childish thing she couldn't let go of.

He bumped his head against the wall, and the first time Toph thought it was an accident, but he kept doing it. "I feel so stupid. I feel like I should have been able to save her. I feel like… _damn_… Do you know what I mean?"

She nodded numbly. "She was a nice girl." It was pathetic, but the best sulky, little girl Toph could manage, despite her best efforts to be nice to him.

He gave her a stricken look, as though he hadn't even considered that Suki might be dead.

_Damn_. Toph thought, immediately wishing she could just knock herself out, immediately realizing what she had said, even without seeing the look on his face.

"I… I meant… Well, she was nice when I met her." She stammered, backpedaling furiously. "She saved me and all."

He nodded, staring glumly at the floor. "Hey, it's okay… I just… I don't know. She's probably stronger than that... I never thought she'd actually be dead, you know, but Azula made it seem like she'd gone mad or something." He shook his head. "I just saw red. I couldn't help myself. I wanted to _kill_ her, and I've never been like that before."

"No one could really blame you for that, you know."

"Actually… I think they could," His voice dropped. "Even though I get so angry, and everything… It's only because those people have tried to hurt Katara, or Aang, or you, or Dad, or anyone else who I actually care about… As for Azula…" He trailed off, and then punched the floor. "I don't really have a big reason to want to kill her, or anyone else for that matter."

He looked away. "I was never really important enough to attack or even consider. The only reason Azula talked to me back there in the volcano is because I could see through her act. Even then, she didn't try to hurt me, just tried to badger me and waste our time."

Toph listened to him quietly, sympathetic to his concerns.

"And I _let_ her. Not only did I waste our time, I put you and Aang in danger, we didn't find the Fire Lord, and we didn't even manage to get _our_ people out of there. I'm such a… a…"

Toph thought about poking fun at him, but thought better of it. This was definitely not the time or place. "Sokka, you were great. If Azula didn't pay attention to you before, it was probably because she didn't think you were worth it, but now she knows better. You were downright scary back there. Even if she doesn't show it, she's afraid of you now. You got us in there, you scared those Fire Nation sissies, and they're gonna know from now on that it's not just the Avatar, or the world's greatest earth-bender they should be afraid of." She reached over and punched him lightly on the shoulder. "Don't be so down on yourself. So we messed up this time. It's not over just yet."

He looked at her and blinked. "You're awfully confident."

Toph thought for a moment. She should be much more solemn than she was in that moment, considering the day's events. But Toph didn't just look at the present, she had to look to the future. Hope for the future was what got her through living with her family, who thought she was a simply mediocre earth-bender, at best. "This can't last forever, Sokka. I really, really believe Aang's going to be the one to end this war and change things for the better. So we didn't make it this time. I don't think he'll let himself fail another time. I don't think you will, either." She looked thoughtful again. "And… you know… If we keep getting knocked down, we have to keep getting up, otherwise the Fire Nation really will win and we'll never stop them from hurting the people we care about."

Sokka didn't say anything for a long moment, before he got up slowly. "You know, Toph, I never really had you pegged as much of an optimist." He offered her a hand to help her up.

She looked annoyed for a minute. "Of course I'm not. I'm just really damn tired of their crap, and I'm not gonna put up with it anymore." She batted at his hand and pushed herself back up on her own, feeling as though maybe she could thank Sokka for her improved mood.

She was surprised when he set a hand on her shoulder. "You don't have to be tough around me, you know. I just spilled my guts to you."

She laughed a little, even though it was strained. "I don't have any guts to spill." She pounded her chest, making him laugh with her. "None, at least, I plan on sharing with you." She started walking toward one of the sanctuaries where Aang had told her she should sleep that night, and then paused, without looking back at him. "I'm sorry for being afraid of you when you lost it back there. I wish I'd have helped you more, or… I don't know. I wish I'd handled it better." There, she'd said it.

"Nah…" He smiled a little at her. "Nah, you were great back there. We couldn't have done much without you there. It's alright if you were a little…" He hesitated to say scared, because Toph and fear didn't seem synonymous, no matter what she said. "It's alright if you were a little hesitant."

"Would… Would Suki have handled it better?" She couldn't stop the words that had been burning at her throat since she started talking to him. Suki was probably prettier than she was, stronger, smarter, and faster. She was just a blind little girl with an ego to compensate for her insecurities.

It was therefore that she had not anticipated Sokka's response.

"I really don't know. I know I feel some kind of something for her, but I don't know Suki all that well, when it comes down to it. She's just really special to me, and charismatic and... I don't know. I like her. But we haven't had the chance to spend a lot of time together, just… getting to know one another." He crossed the room to stand next to her. "Don't sell yourself so short, Toph. You're awesome." He punched her arm.

She returned the punch. "You're damn right I am." She felt stronger again. This time, she was sure she could attribute it to Sokka. "Just wait until I'm older. You won't know what hit you."

He rubbed his arm. "I don't think my arms can take much more."

For the time being, Toph was okay with Sokka thinking that was all she meant. "Let's get to bed."

**End**


End file.
